Operation Epic Road Trip Commences

Operation Leave for Epic Road Trip to Montana commenced yesterday at around 5:30 PM when we rolled into the driveway from Father’s Day weekend.  The list of things to do included:

• Wash all the clothes and bedding that smells like campfire (so… all of it)
• Grocery shop for fresh foods (Aldi to the rescue)
• Make a few meals ahead (meatballs, taco meat)
• Gather all the things we didn’t remember on our practice run: whisk, the good spatula, meat thermometer, flip flops
• Prepare instructions and money for the pet sitters
• Protect Defend the furniture from pets who like to nap where they are not allowed 
• Real showers for all since we can’t say for certain when the next real shower will be

Rob wanted us to be ready by 10:00 PM.  Adorable.

We were not ready at 10:00 PM.

Still not ready at 11:00 PM

Then it was 12:00 AM.  And we were ready.  Two adults, four kids, zero dogs, 6 i-Pads, 12 pillows, eight blankets, half a tank of fresh water, one giant rainbow poop emoji, one x-Box, one U.S. map with scratch off states to mark where we’ve been, one Keurig and ALL the coffee in the world!  If you have been camping with us, you know we do not pack light!

I said four kids!  My heart is so full of joy… Amaya is going with us and I love that we are all taking this trip together.  It’s been months since we were all under the same roof and it is wonderful.  Forced family fun at its finest.

We rolled out of our neighborhood in the dark, Kevin and the “toad” groaning under the weight of all our gear.  The thrill of leaving on an epic adventure in the middle of the night only added to the excitement.  Alyssa and Marlie, tucked in their bunks, played on their i-Pads quietly.  Kai settled on the couch to play a video game, and Amaya put on her headphones and climbed up to the bunk over the cab.

In order to make efficient use of two drivers, Rob suggested the “You sleep, I’ll drive/ I sleep, you drive” strategy.  He would take the first leg of the trip and we would continue alternating sleeping and driving for the next 30.  Yes, 3-0, Hours.  That is how long it takes to get to Livingston, Montana.  And really, that is a conservative estimate.  

All I know is that I went to sleep around 1:30 AM and woke up around 6:30 AM in a Walmart parking lot somewhere near Scranton, Pennsylvania.  I knew I was supposed to initiate the next leg of the trip, but I was terrified I would do something incorrectly, like leave the stabilizers down and drag them behind us, or get lost leaving the parking lot and have to detach the “toad” (you can NOT back up while flat towing a car).  Turns out, I was paying attention (mostly) and was able to get us on the highway pretty quickly.

So. Much. Pressure.  How am I even allowed to drive an RV?  Rob didn’t seem at all worried about me driving Kevin.  He really should have been.  I can only assume, he was delirious from lack of sleep and his judgement was severely impaired. 

It took me a good two-hours to really get my bearings.  My apologies to the good people of central Pennsylvania who drove behind me today at 40 miles an hour on I-80W.  My hands actually hurt right now from white-knuckling my way across Pennsylvania, Ohio, and Indiana.  

During the time that Rob slept today, I found myself enjoying the ride.  I listened to my book (currently listening to The Midnight Library by Matt Haig – so good!) and a playlist of songs I curated especially for this trip.  The highways were open and landscapes changed dramatically from Pennsylvania through Ohio and Indiana. This is the farthest west I have ever driven, and I wish I could have taken photos.  I called for the kids to look several times, but they were… busy. LOL

As we drive through Chicago on our way to, yet another Walmart parking lot for the night, I am reminded of today’s big takeaways:

1. The GPS is fickle.  It will say that you only have 25 hours left in your trip.  Then, when you stop for gas and start back up, it will say you have 26 hours left in your trip.  We drove all day and we still have 20 hours left to drive.  Ugh. How is this even possible?
2. You need to remember to shut the blinds in the camper at night when you want to change your clothes or you risk flashing the drivers behind you. 
3. Pennsylvania is seriously the longest state in the world.  I feel like we drove through it for a hundred hours. When you enter it, beware because you will spend half your life driving across it,
4. Ohio is full of flat farmland.  Most of it looks like a scene out of Twister.
5. Although you can hang out in the back of the RV,which is great, if you need to walk around, you will look like Bambi when he tries to cross the frozen pond.  Teachers, it’s like walking the aisle of a moving school bus when you are on a field trip.  You know the feeling.
6. I can function on three hours of sleep and I will go into any gas station or rest stop without a drop of makeup on and camper hair.  I must have lost my shame somewhere in Pennsylvania.

Today’s greatest accomplishment:  cooking a full dinner while waiting in standstill traffic (bad tractor trailer accident).  Cheese, chicken, and black bean quesadillas with salsa and avocado.  No one needs to eat like savages just because we’re RV’ing it!

Until tomorrow! With one day under our belts and just 36 hours to make it to our first actual campground, we will need to make really good time and cover a LOT of distance. Whatever happens, it’ll be an adventure, for sure!

“If you don’t know where you’re going, any road will get you there.”

~Lewis Carroll